Master is out of town tonight. He texted me instructions, though:
"Blog and internet stuff. I want a video of you playing with yourself with big vibe and fucking yourself with the purple vibe while you watch a video of the 2 of us fucking, whipping and cumming."
A while ago i read an interesting blog about the definition of porn (from floozy.ca, "Slave Musings). Prior to my relationship with Master, i felt very shy about viewing porn let alone filming explicit scenes involving me. Master, however, has brought out His slave's voyeuristic side. (Along with the cock whore He says has been inside all along, but that is another entry.) A few weeks ago, He subscribed to a website because i found it intriguing. We have watched and participated via chat in a few live events. This afternoon, as i was cleaning the bedroom, i watched a live feed of a "House slave" cleaning the guest room as members of the site chatted and asked questions. As i read the blog entries from other submissive/slaves, i feel that sense of voyeurism as well as a connection. Sometimes i see images or read of situations that resonate with me. I find them intriguing as well as learning experiences. Most often i do not find it titillating.
What arouses me most, however, is to watch my own Master interact with His personal property -- me. Viewing a scene gives me a completely different perspective. Sometimes it is quite surprising to see Him using the flogger or cane on my backside. When in the moment, i am often in another space ("subspace"); to hear the cracking sounds, to see the marks appearing, to see His body and to watch how i react is sometimes astonishing to me.
Intellectually, i am interested to later watch along with Master me watching me interact with Master. Since He is usually in control of the whole video aspect, it should be interesting to see how i can manage the technical parts as well. I must admit, too, that the whole idea of filming myself makes me feel shy. I have a suspicion that this is one reason Master has given me these instructions. It's not only for His late-night-away-from-His-slave's viewing pleasure (did i mention i need to take a short video clip while i'm filming so i can send it to Him tonight?). It's to challenge me.
His instructions usually are.
So now it's "lights, camera" ... click "publish post." Action!